If you've finally committed to helping your parents with their finances there is one all-important document you should have. The Durable Power of Attorney for Financial Decisions. This is NOT the Power of Attorney for Health Care, Living Will, Will or other legal documents.

This document allows you to make financial decisions with their money, pay bills, cash checks, open & close accounts, buy or sell investments, the whole nine yards. So, don't be surprised if they object to signing such a powerful document. It's another case of giving up their independence and admitting they can no longer handle their affairs. A very big scary (I'm not ready for the Nursing Home!) realization for them to face! Or, maybe they just don't trust you! "You're just trying to get your hands on my money". Try the following logic...

A will—of course they have one. Health, home and car insurance—who would think of going without these? But to give someone else power of attorney sounds too much like giving away our power before there is any need to do so. Let's clear this up, just in case—it's too important, and too often misunderstood, not to talk about it.

In case of a sudden, grievous accident or illness, each of us certainly wants someone with the legal right to make the decisions we would make, until we're back to our normal mental and physical capacity.

If they won't sign one making you Attorney-in-Fact with financial powers at least try to get them to make one out for each spouse giving power over the other. That way there is someone who can sign should one spouse become incapacitated. The POA can be crafted in such a way that they only take effect when this happens. You can also be added as a alternate should the main agent be unable to act. Believe me, it can happen overnight and the parent can't sign a POA when they're in a coma.

There are boilerplate POA forms out on the Internet and PC programs to write your own. But, a lawyer's fee is worth the peace of mind that you've got the right instructions and trigger wording. They can provide the correct legal verbiage for your state plus they provide the notary stamp & signature. (estate planning fees are tax deductible if you itemize) If you do it yourself and need a notary try your local friendly bank or real estate office. They normally have one on staff and will usually do it for free.

Be sure to make lots of copies for all those places that will ask for one. (no one trusts anyone anymore nowadays)

Believe me, my task would have been far worse if my parents hadn’t the foresight to create POA's when they were still lucid.

NOTE: The POA ceases to have any power when the person dies.